Common Myths and Realities of Adoption Today
Common myths and realities of adoption today
If you've ever mentioned your decision to adopt to friends and family, chances are you've encountered a barrage of questions and concerns from well-meaning friends and family. But let's face it, misconceptions about adoption are often wild and wacky, and the negative stories make the news more often than the positive, so let’s set the record straight.
ONLY THE RICH CAN AFFORD TO ADOPT: Myth.
One of the biggest myths surrounding adoption is the idea that it's only for the affluent. I’d be remiss not to acknowledge that adoption can be out of reach for many, but it's not just reserved for the wealthy elite. Adoption Home Studies of Colorado strives to keep service fees reasonable and in-line with the cost of running the agency, regulatory costs, and the cost of paying our our staff for their high level of experience, knowledge and skills, which greatly benefit our clients.
Most adoptive parents are everyday folks – teachers, first responders, engineers, clergy, entrepreneurs, stay-at-home parents – navigating the adoption process with a range of budgets. From domestic infant adoption to foster care and international adoption, there are options to fit every preference and financial circumstance. Foster care adoption, for instance, often involves minimal cost to the adopting family beyond home studies and legal paperwork because the adoption services are paid for through tax dollars which fund the governmental agencies managing child welfare and adoption. For folks pursuing private infant adoption or international adoption, there are many ways to offset expenses such as adoption tax credits, grants and fundraising to name a few. The bottom line? Through a range of financial support and adoption options, adopting a child is more accessible to families coming from a wide range of circumstances and demographics.
BIRTH PARENTS ARE HOMELESS ADDICTS: Myth.
Then there's the misconception that birth parents fit a specific mold – young, unwed, addict, homeless, and struggling. But the truth is far more diverse. There are various types of birth mothers. While some are teenagers or facing financial challenges and unstable living conditions, a greater majority are parents of all ages who choose adoption for their child do so because they lack the emotional and/or financial resources required to provide for a child. Birth parents come from all walks of life – some are married with children, others are college students working toward a better future, and yes, some face housing instability. The reality is, anyone can find themselves facing an unintended pregnancy and the choice of placing a child for adoption.
BIRTH PARENTS CAN RECLAIM THEIR CHILD AFTER ADOPTION: Mostly myth.
Perhaps the most persistent fear surrounding adoption is the notion that birth parents could reclaim their child after they legally relinquished their parental rights, the revocation period has passed, and after the adoption is finalized. It's a valid concern and has occurred, but it’s a myth rooted more in fiction than fact. Adoption is permanent and life-long for all members of the Adoption Triad (Birth parents, Adoptive Parents, Adopted Person).
Consent, as it relates to adoption, refers to the agreement by a birth parent to relinquish a child for adoption and release all rights and duties with respect to that child. Consent to adoption is regulated by State statutes, not by Federal laws, and States differ in the way they regulate consent. In most States, the consent must be in writing and either witnessed and notarized or executed before a judge or other designated official.
Given that adoption aims to establish stability for children, many state laws restrict the ability of birth parents to revoke their consent once given. Nevertheless, in certain states, a birth parent might retain the option to withdraw their consent, with the court potentially reinstating parental rights based on specific conditions or within a designated timeframe. Check out this resource which covers state laws governing consent.
ADOPTION IS FOREVER: Reality!
Let's not forget the most enduring truth of all – the bonds forged through adoption are every bit as strong and profound as those formed through biology. Adoptive parents share an unbreakable connection with their children, built on love, trust, devotion and steadfast commitment. Whether through birth or adoption, a family is defined not by genetics, but by the boundless capacity for love and acceptance.
So, the next time someone raises an eyebrow at your decision to adopt, arm yourself with the facts. Adoption is not just for the privileged few, birth parents defy stereotypes, and the love between adoptive parents and their children knows no bounds. It's time to dispel the myths and celebrate the beautiful diversity of families created through adoption.